Category: Other Posts

A Quick Thought

Hurray for Facebook!

deborahanndykeman

I am usually a very organized, methodical kind of person. When it comes to blogging…NOT! Maybe that is my writing style in general. I am definitely a SOP writer. This means a ‘seat-of-the-pants’ writer. A story comes to mind and I start writing. As it unfolds, twists and takes over my life, I get it down ‘on laptop’. My blogging takes on the same form. So, when you come to read my posts, you don’t know what you’ll find…and I guess I kind of like it that way. All of life is so planned and full of ‘have-to’ type stuff…why not have a little fun and excitement every once in awhile?

Every since I went back on Facebook again, I have been amazed at the way you can reach out to people. I know my children think I was raised in the Dark Ages, but we did have a telephone, hooked to the wall and we did have a television set. It was even in color and weighed about 500 pounds. I thought we were pretty big-time. But…when I was growing up, you generally still wrote a letter if you wanted to communicate with someone far away. You could call, but that was for VERY special occasions.

I wrote many letters in my pre-teen and teen years. I wrote my paternal grandmother at least monthly and most definitely every time she wrote me. I had an aunt that I wrote very frequently and I had childhood and teenage friends that I wrote for many years. It was always exciting to get that letter or card in the mail. I would recognize the handwriting and usually tear the envelope open on the way to the house, so anxious to read about what was happening in their lives.

Childhood friends were married, we shared pictures of our children. My grandmother always received the latest pictures in the mail. There is a huge part of me that misses that form of communication. This younger generation will never know the simplicity of writing a letter, the excitement of it, that pile of cherished pages.

Facebook has given me the opportunity to reconnect with some of those childhood friends. I’ve been able to see pictures of their spouses, children and now grandchildren. Thirty plus years have come and gone…and WOW, they had a life as well! So many of them moved away from the small town we attended school in. Most have had pretty exciting lives compared to mine. Staying at home and raising children is rather ‘blah’ when stood up next to…well, almost anything probably! But it is what I chose to do, wanted to do and loved doing.

So, here is a positive vote for social media. Like everything in this life it has its good aspects and the not-so-good. Right now I’m mostly enjoying the good ones.

Johnson Family Third Avenue 1972My family in the 1970’s. This ‘me’ is what some friends may remember.

 

A Day to Remember

A Christmas Atmosphere

deborahanndykeman

The aromas of Christmas. If you close your eyes, you can smell them. Crisp, new-fallen snow. Clean and cold in your nose, filling your head with freshness. Cinnamon and cloves, boiling on the stove-top, the taste of apple or pumpkin pie on your tongue. Sugar cookies baking in the oven, lovely and golden on the cookie sheet.

currier and ivesCurrier and Ives Painting

The sights of Christmas. Sparkly lights upon the tree. Each ornament a memory of Christmas’ past. Candles flickering upon a table or in a window, a halo of melted ice upon the pane. Snow piled high against a tree, branches lifting white fluff to the sky. A snow man here and there, stick arms pointing crazily. Colored lights adorning houses, icicles ‘dripping’ from the eaves. Snowflakes dancing on the wind, each one unique.

The sounds of Christmas. Carols being sung around the piano, groups trudging through the cold to the next door. Favorite songs come to mind, floating on the air. Children shrieking with joy, crumpled paper upon the floor. Laughter and reminiscing of long ago, my grandfather’s whistle wafting through my memories.

These are from my Christmas album. Each of us has our own. Christmas at my house while growing up was a really, big deal. We lived in large homes and had several trees. One year, the Breakfast Room tree had only edible items on it. We strung popcorn and cranberries, and gum drops as well. We made sugar cookies and decorated them, a hole at the top for string. My youngest brother loved that tree and really enjoyed it…literally. I don’t think there was a decoration left on it by the time Christmas arrived!

My memories come from places that are cold in December. Colorado, Vermont, New York and Minnesota. But for a couple Christmases we lived in Arizona. My mother kept the air-conditioning on so it would seem ‘cold’ in the house. We painted ‘snow’ on the window panes. With a few, frosty mornings, it even seemed more wintery. My mother was great at creating the ambience of a season.

Have I accomplished that for my own children? I’m afraid I probably haven’t. Putting up one tree each year is more of a task than what I want to do. With only one child still at home, the desire to decorate is even less than it used to be. It just seems like a lot of work to drag out all the decorations, put them up for a month and then put them all away. I would rather enjoy the ‘ambience’ at someone else’s house.

Thankfully, our second to youngest and her husband came over yesterday and put up our tree. We went through the ornaments, reflected on the special ones…the years receded. Our daughter took home the ones that were hers, to display on the beautiful tree she and her husband decorated for their first Christmas.

And life goes on. Christmas is the celebration of our Savior’s birth. All the tradition’s that come in from all over the world are what make the memories that each of us have. It is what makes our Christmases special. Each December, we want to remember those aromas, sights and sounds. We want to pull-out those memories, dust them off and relive them, share them with others and make new ones. THAT is why we drag out the tree and boxes of ornaments. We bake far too many goodies for one family to eat, and burn candles, listening to Christmas music. We want the ‘ambience’ of Christmas.

A Quick Thought

BRRRRRRR…

deborahanndykeman

Okay, I guess the Midwest has finally decided to call it winter. It’s cold outside!!! But more than the cold… is the freezing rain we’ve had for going on the third day now. I used to love to ice-skate. But not from my car to my backdoor! And whose idea was it to put in all that cement anyway?! I know I’m by no means elderly…yet. But the thought of falling and then trying to get back up on the ‘rink’ is more than a little scary these days!

iced tree

So, maybe a day beside the fire with a cup of hot chocolate would be just the thing. Have a great day everyone! Stay safe and warm.

A Day to Remember

Happy Turkey Day!

deborahanndykeman

I realize it’s not Thanksgiving Day…yet. I know it’s not just about the turkey…although it certainly plays a very important part in the festivities. Something that reclines in the center of your table, probably would. But this special time has been on my mind.

Thanksgiving blog

We all have our earliest and favorite memories of Thanksgiving Day. Each year adds another one, until we have an album of sorts to thumb through and cherish.

My earliest memory was when I was in first grade at Spangler Elementary School in Longmont, Colorado. Our class was having a re-enactment of the first Thanksgiving Day. (I thought that was pretty good and special at the time since I was fairly certain  none of us had been there!) We were to wear long dresses and tall, black hats…large white collars. We could dress as Indians if we wanted to. You know, just like the pictures we had been studying in our history book.

My mother stayed up the night before this big day and made me a long, calico skirt to wear. I absolutely loved that skirt and wore it until I was a teenager and it hit at about the knees. I remember getting up the morning of the celebration at school and hoping I had a skirt to wear. And there it laid, across the back of my mother’s rocking chair in its calico glory, yellow zig-zag trim adorning the flounce. I thought it the most beautiful piece of clothing I had ever owned! I wore it proudly to school, a white blouse complimenting my ‘costume’.

Of course most of the boys dressed as Indians. They had feathers in their hair and stripes on their cheeks. I don’t recall any tall, black hats or white collars. I think even at the age of six or seven we knew this was not cool back in 1970-1971. We all looked magnificent in our Thanksgiving Day Celebration glory.

All our mothers were to make a Thanksgiving dish to share. I don’t remember what my own mother made. I was still enthralled with the skirt! We all gathered on the white-tiled floor of our new school classroom, sitting on a large quilt. We then had our Thanksgiving feast and talked about what we had learned. I do remember praying for our meal as well because we were to be, well…thankful.

Of course many, many Thanksgivings have occurred over the years since that one. I always remember a gathering of family and sometimes friends. My mother was a fantastic meal planner and we always had way, too much great-tasting food. Thankgiving blog, 2For a few years we had a wood cook stove in our kitchen and that prepared the turkey to perfection…you just couldn’t stand to be in the kitchen!

One of our years in Crown Point, New York brought a huge snowstorm for Thanksgiving. It was just beautiful and my father got some wonderful pictures of our house at that time for our Christmas cards. In later years, I always thought it pretty special that my future husband was in Schroon Lake that same year.

Our years in Arizona don’t really bring special Thanksgiving memories. I must admit, I had a hard time with the holiday season there. I always wanted the ‘Norman Rockwell’ atmosphere. Arizona is beautiful in its own way…but there are not a lot of deciduous trees and white picket fences. It did snow where we lived at the base of the Catalina Mountains, but seriously…it was just not the same!

My marriage and each additional child added more memories to gather in my mind and bore children and grandchildren with in future years. The cycle will continue this Thursday, Thanksgiving 2015.

What are your special memories of this day? What people and places come to mind? We all have a kaleidoscope to share. For us here in America, let’s remember to be thankful for those first settlers that came. For ALL that gathered together and shared the meal. Remember the freedoms we still have, the people that have fought for them over the centuries. Be thankful for family and friends that make this life more enjoyable and share our burdens so that our load is lighter. Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours!

Thankgiving blog, blessing

Just For Fun!

Gone With the Wind

deborahanndykeman

My absolute favorite characters from any book or movie are Rhett Butler and Scarlett O’Hara. I first read ‘Gone With the Wind’ when I was a young child, but I watched the movie first. I don’t remember the reason, but the movie was showing at our little theater in the town I grew up in and my mother took my brother and I to see it because she had enjoyed it so much.( I think my father said he had slept through most of it the first time he watched it! My husband did the same after I coerced him into watching it with me!)

My inspiration

The movie made a HUGE impact on me. The Civil War was and still is my favorite era. I loved the clothes they wore, the houses they lived in. Yes, I know not everyone lived on a plantation, but in my dreams I would. The concept of slavery and the difficult political situation was lost on me as a nine-year old and all I could think of was the romantic part of the movie. I wanted to meet a ‘Rhett Butler’ someday and be swept away.

At some point, I happened to be in an old book store in that same little town. Wouldn’t you know, they had a very old copy of ‘Gone With the Wind’ and I snatched it up with my paper route money. I read that book in its entirety and loved it! I learned much about the battles that were fought and gained a bit more clearer thinking of the Civil War and what it entailed. Of course I read it several more times over the years, loving the worn gray/blue cover and yellowed pages. It had a smell all its own. I’m afraid that copy ended up in a flood we had in our basement many years ago, because it went missing shortly after that. I still miss it!

I remember thinking as a child that the title for the book was exceptional. That era; the clothing, the mannerisms, the plantations were all truly gone after the Civil War ended. That time period didn’t return. The south was crippled. Again, this post is not to get involved into the issues of slavery…many horrendous things happened during that time period. The south could not continue as it was and probably for the better. But I will always love and enjoy the sweeping grandeur of the movie, the actors, the colors that were so vibrant.

When I think of writing, and great Authors, I think of Margaret Mitchell. Just a housewife, plucking out a great story on her typewriter. That doesn’t come along too often.

The above picture hangs above my desk where I write… for inspiration. This picture means a lot to me because it was a puzzle my husband purchased last Christmas with MANY pieces. Our family spent the first part of the New Year of 2015 putting it together. So not only does the picture mean a lot to me, the memories I will always have assembling it are very special as well!

 

A Quick Thought

Getting Rid of the Dust Bunnies!

deborahanndykeman

We’ve had some cooler weather here in Kansas and Thanksgiving is right around the corner. It’s put me in a different mood…needing a little change.  So I’m cleaning house! Actually, I have most of my fall cleaning done, but I wanted to tidy up here. I’m still trying to figure out WordPress and all the bells and whistles. So please bear with me!

I know when I’m reading something, I like it to be colorful and easy to read. I absolutely LOVE fancy fonts…but they are not so wonderful for this site. I adore muted colors and an old-fashioned look to something, but also maybe not the best for posting.

So stick with me as I find my little comfy chair in blogging. I may change it up a bit here and there, once in awhile.  And as always, please let me know what you think!

Marriage

Happy Anniversary, Mom and Dad!

deborahanndykeman

My parents have been married fifty-two years today. I always remember their anniversary years because they were married one year when I was born. That may not sound like much…but as I grow older, that’s pretty important to me!

M&M anniversary

What makes a couple commit to fifty-two years of marriage? Let’s set aside the number of years and make it seventy-five, thirty or maybe five. Usually by the time you’ve been married even five years, you know that person fairly well. As the years add up, that knowledge grows…and you still make a commitment to share your life with that person.

This is NOT a post to judge others that don’t make it to many, many years of marriage. Each person has to evaluate their own life and decide what roads they need to take. This post is more about thoughts on why couples DO stay married. And it is different for every marriage.

My book, To Thee I’m Wed, (available on Amazon for $9.99, :)) deals with this topic. Many couples would have decided to go their separate ways under the circumstances that Jason and Kathy Miller faced. But they remained in their marriage. It doesn’t make them better people, just the decision they made.

If you’ve been married more than one year, you know marriage is NOT a ‘bed of roses’, a ‘walk in the park’, or ‘easy peasey’ as we used to say as children. You have days and months that go well and you really love that person you made a commitment to…that may go on for even a year or so. Then…you have hours, days, months and hopefully not too many years when you really don’t feel much love and sometimes don’t even like that person. But you stay committed.

In this day and age, when you don’t want to stay with a phone plan for more than a few months before a better offer comes along, marriage has taken a hit. Years ago, you were married young and you stuck it out. That was your spouse until one of you left this earth. Not so much anymore.

That’s what sparked my interest even more on why a couple decide to stay together in this era when there is always a better phone plan. Because let’s face it, that other person has their less-than-perfect attributes. Sometimes the ‘lovey-dovey’ feelings don’t look past the mud on the floor or the bucket-load of dirty laundry. Think about what makes you stay committed. Are you in it for the ‘long-haul’ or is Verizon calling?

Just For Fun!

Ozark Mountain Memories

deborahanndykeman

missouri in the fallThis was our past five days…Branson, Missouri. My husband and I were very thankful to get away for a while. One of the days was spent driving around the country side. I grew up in Colorado and my husband lived in upstate New York until his mid-twenties. So neither of us were strangers to mountain roads. But it has been a LONG time! Needless to say, after several hours of driving around the back roads north, west, and east of Branson…we were a little jittery. Black-topped roads, twisting among the autumn foliage, no shoulder to speak of and local people driving with confidence, made for an exhausting day. I haven’t been car sick for a few years, so I had the wonderful experience of that again…even sitting in the front seat.

The beauty of the views was extraordinary! Climbing the steep grade, cresting the top with hills covered with the remains of color. Deep valleys below, water shimmering in the distance. You could just picture a small cabin, nestled against the hillside, puffs of smoke from the chimney floating lazily in the cool breeze.

Of course my mind had to drift back to the early years in the Ozarks. Before there were paved roads to make the travel easy. Back to the days when a small cabin was home to a very large family. Water was pumped from a well or carried from a mountain stream. Food for eating was planted on the steep hillside when no flat area was available. Chickens roamed freely, pecking bugs from the ground. The colors of each season greeted you in the morning and at night, the whispering wind sang you a sweet melody.

I didn’t grow up in the Ozarks and I haven’t lived there. But I can imagine all the above and it gave me a sense of homesickness as we were driving through all that beauty. A loss for what once was. The lives of the people that experienced that time period, were difficult, I’m sure. No modern conveniences like stores or doctors nearby. No running water or electricity.

What they did have, was family, friends, and time. Time to appreciate the seasons, time to plant crops, time to sit on the porch and listen to the night sounds. In our world today of ‘hurry, rush, don’t be late’, there isn’t much time for the simple pleasures anymore. The Ozark people of long ago just lived their lives, doing what needed to be done to survive. We do the same in our world today, but it seems so much more complicated. Am I envious of that long-ago world? Yes, in a lot of ways. If a person from that time were dropped in our world of today, they would probably think I was crazy to say that. Then they would return to their porch or hillside and look over the rolling mountains…and sigh with relief.

missouri mountains

Just some thoughts to share on a Thursday afternoon.

A Day to Remember

A Day REALLY makes a difference!

deborahanndykeman

Wow! ‘What a difference a day makes’! Remember that old saying? I’m going to call it ‘old’ because I remember a song by the same title and it was around before I was! It was sung by Dinah Washington. You can listen to this great song right here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OmBxVfQTuvI

For those of you that are a little younger than I, you may prefer this version by Amy Winehouse: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h_MllRG5aBU

Or…if you would love to hear a little girl with a VERY big voice, check it out: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZSfgCIGd7k4 I absolutely love her long hair!

I love that the last two versions use the original arrangement that Dinah Washington sung. It’s also fantastic to see some younger people singing the ‘oldies but goodies’! Thank you to those that posted the above on YouTube so that I could share them on here.

Yesterday, I was finally able to have the printed version of my book on CreateSpace. That was wonderful enough. But later that night, my oldest daughter was here helping with editing, technical ‘stuff’ again and she checked Amazon. There it was! Now this was especially exciting because CreateSpace had said yesterday that it wouldn’t be available through Amazon for 3-5 business days. There it was! So many people have asked if it would be available at Amazon because it is just easier to purchase through them. It was just amazing to see my book on the Amazon page!!! You may purchase the e-version and the printed version through links on here as well as my Facebook page.

I had a wild, crazy, and exciting ride yesterday in the publishing journey. I woke up this morning to a drippy, overcast sky…usually a little depressing for me. I crave sunlight and occasionally like a cloudy day. But then I remembered that song, which isn’t talking about publishing or the weather. It did seem to fit my thoughts for the day. ‘What a Difference a Day Makes’…I pray your day makes a difference in someone’s life.

Marriage

Happy Anniversary!

deborahanndykeman

Happy Anniversary, to my dear husband! Yes, it’s been 31 years today.October 20, 1984; George & Deborah Dykeman with Grandma McMillen & Auntie This picture shows my new husband and me after the wedding with my maternal grandmother and her sister, my great-aunt. Both have gone on to be with the Lord now. My grandmother was not able to make it to the wedding because of health issues, so we went upstairs to her room and had this picture taken. Both of these dear women are greatly missed in my life.

October 20, 1984 dawned bright and beautiful in upstate New York. The leaves were  hanging in there and some color was still visible. That day reached a high of 80 degrees, which is rather unusual for that area in the Catskill mountains. I had wanted a candlelight ceremony which was gorgeous and very special, but it also meant I had to wait the ENTIRE day to see my soon-to-be husband. I cautioned my three daughters on that very thing when they were planning their weddings. (Must have been the reason we had two early morning weddings!)

I remember I didn’t sleep much the night before and stayed up late washing my clothes to take with me and ironing them. The next day I couldn’t eat much and spent my time doing my nails, putting Nair on my face for that pesky, peach fuzz. That resulted in big, red splotches of color between my brows and on my upper lip. So of course I cautioned my daughters to not do that as well! It’s amazing what foundation can do! I had a flawless complexion by 5:30, the time of the ceremony. But…

My grandmother was staying with us, my mother caring for her in our home at the time. In the process of helping her in the bathroom, the toilet tank was broken. My grandmother’s room was above the living room. The reception was to be at the house. My mother had placed dishes of mints artistically around the room. You guessed it, the water, several gallons of it leaked through the ceiling and into the living room. Those mints were really pretty floating in their little dishes. So, my father, father of the bride, made a trip to town to purchase a toilet tank and spent the afternoon repairing the damage done.

Yes, we made it to the wedding on time, rinsed mints and all. (Yes, my father actually suggested this to my mother. But they were thrown out.) The sun was starting its descent, the last rays glowing brilliantly when the two doors were opened and my father and I walked into that little, white church in that New England town. There stood my future husband, tall and handsome at the front of the church. Thus began our years together.

I know celebrating 31 years is about ALL the years you have shared as a couple. I do remember and rejoice in those years as well. But my mind always goes back to that day in October, how young we were, how thin we were, how full of expectation and happiness for our future together. And that’s the way it should be. I love to think back on that day, all those emotions and relive them again. I pray I am able to do that until I am gone from this world. I keep our wedding pictures placed around our house…to remember where we started. To share that day with our children and now grandchildren…those people that God knew would share our lives someday but we were unaware of at the time.

Happy Anniversary, dear husband. Thank you for sharing the past 31 years with me, not always by my side, but in my soul and part of me. I look forward to many more. And you know what? It really does just keep getting better and better!

edited for facebook