Category: Other Posts

A Quick Thought

BRRRRRRR…

deborahanndykeman

Okay, I guess the Midwest has finally decided to call it winter. It’s cold outside!!! But more than the cold… is the freezing rain we’ve had for going on the third day now. I used to love to ice-skate. But not from my car to my backdoor! And whose idea was it to put in all that cement anyway?! I know I’m by no means elderly…yet. But the thought of falling and then trying to get back up on the ‘rink’ is more than a little scary these days!

iced tree

So, maybe a day beside the fire with a cup of hot chocolate would be just the thing. Have a great day everyone! Stay safe and warm.

A Day to Remember

Happy Turkey Day!

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I realize it’s not Thanksgiving Day…yet. I know it’s not just about the turkey…although it certainly plays a very important part in the festivities. Something that reclines in the center of your table, probably would. But this special time has been on my mind.

Thanksgiving blog

We all have our earliest and favorite memories of Thanksgiving Day. Each year adds another one, until we have an album of sorts to thumb through and cherish.

My earliest memory was when I was in first grade at Spangler Elementary School in Longmont, Colorado. Our class was having a re-enactment of the first Thanksgiving Day. (I thought that was pretty good and special at the time since I was fairly certain  none of us had been there!) We were to wear long dresses and tall, black hats…large white collars. We could dress as Indians if we wanted to. You know, just like the pictures we had been studying in our history book.

My mother stayed up the night before this big day and made me a long, calico skirt to wear. I absolutely loved that skirt and wore it until I was a teenager and it hit at about the knees. I remember getting up the morning of the celebration at school and hoping I had a skirt to wear. And there it laid, across the back of my mother’s rocking chair in its calico glory, yellow zig-zag trim adorning the flounce. I thought it the most beautiful piece of clothing I had ever owned! I wore it proudly to school, a white blouse complimenting my ‘costume’.

Of course most of the boys dressed as Indians. They had feathers in their hair and stripes on their cheeks. I don’t recall any tall, black hats or white collars. I think even at the age of six or seven we knew this was not cool back in 1970-1971. We all looked magnificent in our Thanksgiving Day Celebration glory.

All our mothers were to make a Thanksgiving dish to share. I don’t remember what my own mother made. I was still enthralled with the skirt! We all gathered on the white-tiled floor of our new school classroom, sitting on a large quilt. We then had our Thanksgiving feast and talked about what we had learned. I do remember praying for our meal as well because we were to be, well…thankful.

Of course many, many Thanksgivings have occurred over the years since that one. I always remember a gathering of family and sometimes friends. My mother was a fantastic meal planner and we always had way, too much great-tasting food. Thankgiving blog, 2For a few years we had a wood cook stove in our kitchen and that prepared the turkey to perfection…you just couldn’t stand to be in the kitchen!

One of our years in Crown Point, New York brought a huge snowstorm for Thanksgiving. It was just beautiful and my father got some wonderful pictures of our house at that time for our Christmas cards. In later years, I always thought it pretty special that my future husband was in Schroon Lake that same year.

Our years in Arizona don’t really bring special Thanksgiving memories. I must admit, I had a hard time with the holiday season there. I always wanted the ‘Norman Rockwell’ atmosphere. Arizona is beautiful in its own way…but there are not a lot of deciduous trees and white picket fences. It did snow where we lived at the base of the Catalina Mountains, but seriously…it was just not the same!

My marriage and each additional child added more memories to gather in my mind and bore children and grandchildren with in future years. The cycle will continue this Thursday, Thanksgiving 2015.

What are your special memories of this day? What people and places come to mind? We all have a kaleidoscope to share. For us here in America, let’s remember to be thankful for those first settlers that came. For ALL that gathered together and shared the meal. Remember the freedoms we still have, the people that have fought for them over the centuries. Be thankful for family and friends that make this life more enjoyable and share our burdens so that our load is lighter. Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours!

Thankgiving blog, blessing

Just For Fun!

Gone With the Wind

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My absolute favorite characters from any book or movie are Rhett Butler and Scarlett O’Hara. I first read ‘Gone With the Wind’ when I was a young child, but I watched the movie first. I don’t remember the reason, but the movie was showing at our little theater in the town I grew up in and my mother took my brother and I to see it because she had enjoyed it so much.( I think my father said he had slept through most of it the first time he watched it! My husband did the same after I coerced him into watching it with me!)

My inspiration

The movie made a HUGE impact on me. The Civil War was and still is my favorite era. I loved the clothes they wore, the houses they lived in. Yes, I know not everyone lived on a plantation, but in my dreams I would. The concept of slavery and the difficult political situation was lost on me as a nine-year old and all I could think of was the romantic part of the movie. I wanted to meet a ‘Rhett Butler’ someday and be swept away.

At some point, I happened to be in an old book store in that same little town. Wouldn’t you know, they had a very old copy of ‘Gone With the Wind’ and I snatched it up with my paper route money. I read that book in its entirety and loved it! I learned much about the battles that were fought and gained a bit more clearer thinking of the Civil War and what it entailed. Of course I read it several more times over the years, loving the worn gray/blue cover and yellowed pages. It had a smell all its own. I’m afraid that copy ended up in a flood we had in our basement many years ago, because it went missing shortly after that. I still miss it!

I remember thinking as a child that the title for the book was exceptional. That era; the clothing, the mannerisms, the plantations were all truly gone after the Civil War ended. That time period didn’t return. The south was crippled. Again, this post is not to get involved into the issues of slavery…many horrendous things happened during that time period. The south could not continue as it was and probably for the better. But I will always love and enjoy the sweeping grandeur of the movie, the actors, the colors that were so vibrant.

When I think of writing, and great Authors, I think of Margaret Mitchell. Just a housewife, plucking out a great story on her typewriter. That doesn’t come along too often.

The above picture hangs above my desk where I write… for inspiration. This picture means a lot to me because it was a puzzle my husband purchased last Christmas with MANY pieces. Our family spent the first part of the New Year of 2015 putting it together. So not only does the picture mean a lot to me, the memories I will always have assembling it are very special as well!

 

A Quick Thought

Getting Rid of the Dust Bunnies!

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We’ve had some cooler weather here in Kansas and Thanksgiving is right around the corner. It’s put me in a different mood…needing a little change.  So I’m cleaning house! Actually, I have most of my fall cleaning done, but I wanted to tidy up here. I’m still trying to figure out WordPress and all the bells and whistles. So please bear with me!

I know when I’m reading something, I like it to be colorful and easy to read. I absolutely LOVE fancy fonts…but they are not so wonderful for this site. I adore muted colors and an old-fashioned look to something, but also maybe not the best for posting.

So stick with me as I find my little comfy chair in blogging. I may change it up a bit here and there, once in awhile.  And as always, please let me know what you think!

Marriage

Happy Anniversary, Mom and Dad!

deborahanndykeman

My parents have been married fifty-two years today. I always remember their anniversary years because they were married one year when I was born. That may not sound like much…but as I grow older, that’s pretty important to me!

M&M anniversary

What makes a couple commit to fifty-two years of marriage? Let’s set aside the number of years and make it seventy-five, thirty or maybe five. Usually by the time you’ve been married even five years, you know that person fairly well. As the years add up, that knowledge grows…and you still make a commitment to share your life with that person.

This is NOT a post to judge others that don’t make it to many, many years of marriage. Each person has to evaluate their own life and decide what roads they need to take. This post is more about thoughts on why couples DO stay married. And it is different for every marriage.

My book, To Thee I’m Wed, (available on Amazon for $9.99, :)) deals with this topic. Many couples would have decided to go their separate ways under the circumstances that Jason and Kathy Miller faced. But they remained in their marriage. It doesn’t make them better people, just the decision they made.

If you’ve been married more than one year, you know marriage is NOT a ‘bed of roses’, a ‘walk in the park’, or ‘easy peasey’ as we used to say as children. You have days and months that go well and you really love that person you made a commitment to…that may go on for even a year or so. Then…you have hours, days, months and hopefully not too many years when you really don’t feel much love and sometimes don’t even like that person. But you stay committed.

In this day and age, when you don’t want to stay with a phone plan for more than a few months before a better offer comes along, marriage has taken a hit. Years ago, you were married young and you stuck it out. That was your spouse until one of you left this earth. Not so much anymore.

That’s what sparked my interest even more on why a couple decide to stay together in this era when there is always a better phone plan. Because let’s face it, that other person has their less-than-perfect attributes. Sometimes the ‘lovey-dovey’ feelings don’t look past the mud on the floor or the bucket-load of dirty laundry. Think about what makes you stay committed. Are you in it for the ‘long-haul’ or is Verizon calling?

Just For Fun!

Ozark Mountain Memories

deborahanndykeman

missouri in the fallThis was our past five days…Branson, Missouri. My husband and I were very thankful to get away for a while. One of the days was spent driving around the country side. I grew up in Colorado and my husband lived in upstate New York until his mid-twenties. So neither of us were strangers to mountain roads. But it has been a LONG time! Needless to say, after several hours of driving around the back roads north, west, and east of Branson…we were a little jittery. Black-topped roads, twisting among the autumn foliage, no shoulder to speak of and local people driving with confidence, made for an exhausting day. I haven’t been car sick for a few years, so I had the wonderful experience of that again…even sitting in the front seat.

The beauty of the views was extraordinary! Climbing the steep grade, cresting the top with hills covered with the remains of color. Deep valleys below, water shimmering in the distance. You could just picture a small cabin, nestled against the hillside, puffs of smoke from the chimney floating lazily in the cool breeze.

Of course my mind had to drift back to the early years in the Ozarks. Before there were paved roads to make the travel easy. Back to the days when a small cabin was home to a very large family. Water was pumped from a well or carried from a mountain stream. Food for eating was planted on the steep hillside when no flat area was available. Chickens roamed freely, pecking bugs from the ground. The colors of each season greeted you in the morning and at night, the whispering wind sang you a sweet melody.

I didn’t grow up in the Ozarks and I haven’t lived there. But I can imagine all the above and it gave me a sense of homesickness as we were driving through all that beauty. A loss for what once was. The lives of the people that experienced that time period, were difficult, I’m sure. No modern conveniences like stores or doctors nearby. No running water or electricity.

What they did have, was family, friends, and time. Time to appreciate the seasons, time to plant crops, time to sit on the porch and listen to the night sounds. In our world today of ‘hurry, rush, don’t be late’, there isn’t much time for the simple pleasures anymore. The Ozark people of long ago just lived their lives, doing what needed to be done to survive. We do the same in our world today, but it seems so much more complicated. Am I envious of that long-ago world? Yes, in a lot of ways. If a person from that time were dropped in our world of today, they would probably think I was crazy to say that. Then they would return to their porch or hillside and look over the rolling mountains…and sigh with relief.

missouri mountains

Just some thoughts to share on a Thursday afternoon.

A Day to Remember

A Day REALLY makes a difference!

deborahanndykeman

Wow! ‘What a difference a day makes’! Remember that old saying? I’m going to call it ‘old’ because I remember a song by the same title and it was around before I was! It was sung by Dinah Washington. You can listen to this great song right here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OmBxVfQTuvI

For those of you that are a little younger than I, you may prefer this version by Amy Winehouse: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h_MllRG5aBU

Or…if you would love to hear a little girl with a VERY big voice, check it out: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZSfgCIGd7k4 I absolutely love her long hair!

I love that the last two versions use the original arrangement that Dinah Washington sung. It’s also fantastic to see some younger people singing the ‘oldies but goodies’! Thank you to those that posted the above on YouTube so that I could share them on here.

Yesterday, I was finally able to have the printed version of my book on CreateSpace. That was wonderful enough. But later that night, my oldest daughter was here helping with editing, technical ‘stuff’ again and she checked Amazon. There it was! Now this was especially exciting because CreateSpace had said yesterday that it wouldn’t be available through Amazon for 3-5 business days. There it was! So many people have asked if it would be available at Amazon because it is just easier to purchase through them. It was just amazing to see my book on the Amazon page!!! You may purchase the e-version and the printed version through links on here as well as my Facebook page.

I had a wild, crazy, and exciting ride yesterday in the publishing journey. I woke up this morning to a drippy, overcast sky…usually a little depressing for me. I crave sunlight and occasionally like a cloudy day. But then I remembered that song, which isn’t talking about publishing or the weather. It did seem to fit my thoughts for the day. ‘What a Difference a Day Makes’…I pray your day makes a difference in someone’s life.

Marriage

Happy Anniversary!

deborahanndykeman

Happy Anniversary, to my dear husband! Yes, it’s been 31 years today.October 20, 1984; George & Deborah Dykeman with Grandma McMillen & Auntie This picture shows my new husband and me after the wedding with my maternal grandmother and her sister, my great-aunt. Both have gone on to be with the Lord now. My grandmother was not able to make it to the wedding because of health issues, so we went upstairs to her room and had this picture taken. Both of these dear women are greatly missed in my life.

October 20, 1984 dawned bright and beautiful in upstate New York. The leaves were  hanging in there and some color was still visible. That day reached a high of 80 degrees, which is rather unusual for that area in the Catskill mountains. I had wanted a candlelight ceremony which was gorgeous and very special, but it also meant I had to wait the ENTIRE day to see my soon-to-be husband. I cautioned my three daughters on that very thing when they were planning their weddings. (Must have been the reason we had two early morning weddings!)

I remember I didn’t sleep much the night before and stayed up late washing my clothes to take with me and ironing them. The next day I couldn’t eat much and spent my time doing my nails, putting Nair on my face for that pesky, peach fuzz. That resulted in big, red splotches of color between my brows and on my upper lip. So of course I cautioned my daughters to not do that as well! It’s amazing what foundation can do! I had a flawless complexion by 5:30, the time of the ceremony. But…

My grandmother was staying with us, my mother caring for her in our home at the time. In the process of helping her in the bathroom, the toilet tank was broken. My grandmother’s room was above the living room. The reception was to be at the house. My mother had placed dishes of mints artistically around the room. You guessed it, the water, several gallons of it leaked through the ceiling and into the living room. Those mints were really pretty floating in their little dishes. So, my father, father of the bride, made a trip to town to purchase a toilet tank and spent the afternoon repairing the damage done.

Yes, we made it to the wedding on time, rinsed mints and all. (Yes, my father actually suggested this to my mother. But they were thrown out.) The sun was starting its descent, the last rays glowing brilliantly when the two doors were opened and my father and I walked into that little, white church in that New England town. There stood my future husband, tall and handsome at the front of the church. Thus began our years together.

I know celebrating 31 years is about ALL the years you have shared as a couple. I do remember and rejoice in those years as well. But my mind always goes back to that day in October, how young we were, how thin we were, how full of expectation and happiness for our future together. And that’s the way it should be. I love to think back on that day, all those emotions and relive them again. I pray I am able to do that until I am gone from this world. I keep our wedding pictures placed around our house…to remember where we started. To share that day with our children and now grandchildren…those people that God knew would share our lives someday but we were unaware of at the time.

Happy Anniversary, dear husband. Thank you for sharing the past 31 years with me, not always by my side, but in my soul and part of me. I look forward to many more. And you know what? It really does just keep getting better and better!

edited for facebook

A Day to Remember

A Time to Cherish

deborahanndykeman

Change. If you’ve been reading my posts lately, you know there is a theme going on here. Not planned, my writing rarely is. That probably shows on many levels to some people! For me, writing is a way to express myself, a time to reach within and bring out those thoughts, emotions and ideas I’m not always great at expressing. My writing is usually about what is going on in my life at a given time.

So, back to change. Maybe it’s the fall colors beginning to dance in the Kansas wind. Perhaps the cool breeze lifting the bedroom curtain each night. A recent wedding and an announcement of a new grandchild greeting the world this coming April. All the above are changes in my life, and changes cause me to reflect on what once was. Maybe it’s my OCD, but I go back to the beginning and set everything in tidy order. It gives me a chance to remember, to make adjustments in my way of viewing certain circumstances that have occurred. Hopefully I’ve matured along the way and the conclusions I come to now…sometimes years later, are more thought out, less congested with emotion…and much more appreciated.

So this morning, I’m remembering my siblings. I’m thinking back on what once was. Most of us have siblings. Most of us don’t appreciate them at the time…the years when we are growing to adulthood. But whether we want to accept it or not, those years shape us to a certain extent. We can grow older, move away, take different roads in our lives…but those years together are still there. Some could take this in a negative way if those growing up years were not the best, but I choose to remember mine with fondness. No, they were not perfect, but I venture to say most of us probably didn’t have perfection. That is not what matters…you had a relationship. This post is dedicated to my siblings, all younger than me since I was the oldest. (A little math for your early morning!)

Growing up, I was thankful, (yes, even at the time) for my siblings. My father worked for IBM and we moved a bit. During my teenage years, this was more frequent and for me, my home base was my safe zone. I could go home after a day at school, trying to adjust to all the new faces and classes and find comfort in the familiarity of my family and my surroundings. With all the moves, my mother was excellent at setting up a house and making it homey. It was my refuge. My siblings were always there, a sure thing in an upside down world. When I didn’t have friends at school or in the neighborhood because we were ‘new’, I could always play, talk and be with my siblings. Even if it was the same-old bickering about silly little things, it was MY family.

The memories for me come in bits and pieces. A certain smell in the air, a laugh or a mannerism our daughters share that is so like my sister. Flowers make me think of my brother, Kreston and his artistic talents in so many areas. Curly hair always reminds me of my sister, Jennifer and the blonde curls springing from her head when she was a child. And it makes me smile. My youngest brother, Todd…where there is a will, there is a way and he ALWAYS found a way! Fair time brings to mind all those August days in upstate New York. I was pretty much doing my own thing and then married by the time my family was showing horses, but I remember those days well. All the holidays we shared, the games we played on those days and the great food…especially a certain pie my brother ‘enjoyed’ all on his own!

These are times and relationships that have helped to shape me into what I am today. And even though my siblings may never see this post, I pray they know and understand what they mean to me…the part they have played in my life. I wish all of you happy memories to take out and savor. I pray these memories for my own children and caution them to protect their relationship among the five of them. You may move, develop different opinions, but the relationship and the closeness you once had can be cherished. And if possible, it can continue.

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A Day to Remember

Such a Beautiful Day for a Wedding!

deborahanndykeman

Weddings and the day a baby is born are beautiful experiences for me and I’m sure many others as well.

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Our third daughter married a wonderful young man on September 19th. And it was a beautiful day. Not just the perfect weather, which was a blessing, but the blending of two families as this young couple begin their own life together. The above picture is with the parents of the bride and groom. The video you can link to below is from the photographer and friend of the bride and groom. I’m sure you would agree that she did a fantastic job. So, a tribute to our third daughter and her new husband, our third son-in-law. May God bless you with many, many wonderful and joyous years together. With much love…

http://www.alannasingerphotography.com/#!alyssa-and-mitchel/if5xn